It’s been a long, yet short day–one that absolutely calls for a Belmontonian-style songwriter’s contradiction. Perhaps I’ll write a song about these last few days called The Longness of Short.
It all began Thursday evening as the clock struck six. We grabbed our keys from the Bruin Hills clubhouse and checked in. Then the moving began. It took until 1am to have all our stuff simply moved over to the apartment. Somewhere in the evening–I’m really not sure when, it was all a blur–Em and her roomie from this year came over and brought us McFlurries for a much needed break. I’m only throwin’ a half-thanks out for that one since mine was dropped on the asphalt before handed to me. After the ladies left, we continued to get stuff moved in.
Somewhere around 2:30 we headed out for Walmart. We needed some cleaning supplies very badly. Waving our cleaning right may not have been the best idea, even if it did mean we got to move in four days sooner. On our delirious ride back Chun uttered the fateful phrase: “Don’t we need a shower curtain?” ARRR! Of course we did, and that necessity ultimately merited an immediate return trip to Walmart. While Chun sleep and flatulated in the car, I hurried inside, it now being 4:11 in the morning, to retrieve a shower curtain and some lighter fluid. Lighter fluid? I don’t know, it was 4:13, I was delirious, don’t hate.
Chun had work on the morrow, so I let him hit the proverbial sheets–though in reality they were still packed–while I took my masterful cleaning skills to the horrendous bathroom. I mean, dang. The girls before us did not treat this bathroom right. The store brand equivalent of CLR ate off my flesh as I scoured over the shower. I’ll frolic in my own filth, but someone else’s is a different store entirely.
The next day, separated from the previous by only a nap, saw us headed back to Wally World. It was most fantastic and enjoyable trip, and on the way back we decided to get Chun a Sam’s Club card off his daddy’s account so that we could buy normal foodstuffs in ridiculous bulk later on. As the jolly lady was making Chun’s card, she pointed at me and said, “Would you like to make him a card on your account as well?” Chun agreed, and so my card was made (on the back on Chun’s student ID, but that’s another story). Some time later a thought came to me. “Chun, you don’t think she gave me that card because she thinks I’m your boyfriend do you?”
“Geez, I hope not.” We both became instantly concerned about the possibility of putting off massive “gay vibes”. I came to the conclusion that it probably wasn’t a good idea to be publicly referring to things as “ours”. I just happened to take my card out to look at it, only to find these words seared into the plastic below my picture: Business Secondary Spouse. Oh no. Oh, this can’t be good. Further more, Chun says I’m the woman.
Later on some very disturbing coincidences came to light. He’s the one with the job, and I stay home and clean the dishes. I have long hair and bigger boobs than him. And he spoons me… I mean, what? CRAP!
Tonight, I wanted to make sweet tea. I love that stuff. Everything was clean, and so I thought it a proper time to begin tea-making. I proceeded to open the coffeemaker to insert the teabags, and contrary to the assurances of cleanliness in the entire kitchen, I found a moldy chalupa hiding inside the coffeemaker. Chun swears it is a long since used coffee filter, but I saw no signs of filter paper… only a morbidly rigid Mexican dish. Sick.
Let me throw out mad props to the cleaning crew: Kristy and Tara. Without their expertise, there would still be a cup of yogurt crouching behind the stove.
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