in medias res

One more before I walk away. I have been thinking of something so simple, that it could possibly take pages to really lay it all out. Here’s the thought, most likely siphoned from some great thinker rather than from my own ideas: It should not be so difficult to love others as I love myself.

The reason? Because in my attempt to love others, I have something with which to compare that is a beautiful analogy. Despite my shortcoming, my disgust with myself, the knowledge of my own intentional deceits, I still love myself. I may not like myself, I may really feel that I am a rather unsavory person, and yet I still hope for the best for myself.

And as I’ve been sitting here, I’ve thought of who that great thinker might be. I believe it was C.S. Lewis, whom I referenced just one post ago.

Now that I come to think of it, I have not exactly got a feeling of fondness or affection for myself, and I do not even always enjoy my own society. So apparently “Love your neighbor” does not mean “feel fond of him” or “find him attractive.” I ought to have seen that before, because of course, you cannot feel fond of a person by trying. Do I think well of myself, think myself a nice chap? Well, I am afraid I sometimes do (and those are, no doubt, my worst moments) but that is not why I love myself. In fact it is the other way round: my self-love makes me think myself nice, but thinking myself nice is not why I love myself. So loving my enemies does not apparently mean thinking them nice either. That is an enormous relief. For a good many people imagine that forgiving your enemies means making out that they are really not such bad fellows after all, when it is quite plain that they are. Go a step further. In my most clear-sighted moments not only do I not think myself a nice man, but I know that I am a very nasty one. I can at look some of the things I have done with loathing and horror. So apparently I am allowed to loathe and hate some of the things my enemies do.

Mere Christianity, Bk. III, ch. 7

Ah. Well then, I need not say more. It seems that a much more gifted writer and thinker really has laid it out ahead of me.